


Scion

by littleberd



Category: Invader Zim, The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy
Genre: Billy and Gir get along great!, Dib is confused, F/F, Keef and Puddin, M/M, Mandy and Gaz hitting it off, Professor Membrane and his deep dark and dangerous secrets, Professor Membrane really only wants to protect his kids, Professor seems like a worried father, Secrets~, Sort of? - Freeform, Tak just wants to get off the planet and back to simpler Galactical life instead of this drama, Tallest Purple and Red find out that something has gone horribly wrong with their plans, Zim causing chaos wherever he goes, Zim doesn't understand what's going on, but he's not really worried for Dib, but she does believe Mandy and Gaz are badass allies, but worried about losing him, his fault, hissssssss, it's not, just don't let them in the kitchen, of course they're cousins, technically, the gingers, to get rid of Zim, too many tags, until he does, until he's not, which he is
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-16
Updated: 2016-05-14
Packaged: 2018-04-04 06:07:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4127754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleberd/pseuds/littleberd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dib and Zim have been too swamped by homework to fight. But, during a moment of rage quit, Dib remembers Zim's first Halloween here on Earth. And the look of complete terror on his face. When They entered Dib's mind and almost unleashed a hoard of shiver-worthy monsters hell-bent on getting out and taking over Earth on the outside. One thing stands out to Dib... a monster version of Zim never appeared in his twisted giant head. Now Dib is going back in to find answers... and what secrets he finds buried in his own mind are almost too paranormal to be believed. Dib is almost sure it's just a demented dream or, in his case, a mind-fuck beyond what any mortal creature could comprehend... but when Dib emerges with his own discoveries, nothing will be the same. Because Dib is going to drag the truth from the shadows, whether they claw into the floor or bite at his hands to keep him away. It is all futile. Dib will be a paranormal investigator in the future after all. And this might just be the biggest thing in his life since seeing Zim for the first time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Answers

**Author's Note:**

> sorry guys! but this wouldn't get out of my head until I wrote it down! Seriously lost my focus on Odium, so I'm going to work on this a bit and get back to my other stories eventually. I just can't seem to focus on one story for more than a few months without getting distracted on something banging around in my head! And I'm not going to give you guys some half-assed story! You readers deserve better than that! So I'm taking a break and starting on something new.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zim, even when he is not there physically, is distracting and Dib just wants to finish his homework. But Dib's analyzation of the last few years is messing with him and Dib stumbles upon something that needs to be seen... if it exists.
> 
> Meanwhile, a certain little green insectoid spaceboy, is getting bored... and a bored Zim is more dangerous than a Gir that has a death ray with the potential of killing off an entire population with a pull of a trigger. And so, in his boredom, he looks to see what The Dib is up to. Having placed multiple cameras, tracers, and bugs on his person and in his room.
> 
> This isn't going to be good...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like it guys!

Hi-Skool has been dishing out homework like a broken copy machine for the past 3 weeks.

_Finals are coming up and the teachers are trying to cover their lazy asses since they let the classroom run rampant the 9 months, 2 weeks, and 4 days prior of this 3/4ths of a month of hell on Earth. Even Zim, the little green insectoid cheating Alien Scum, has been too busy doing off-the-wall projects and crazy ass algebra equation worksheets to try and takeover the world with any diabolical and just slight of stupid inventions or plans or death rays of Doom. Which is a good thing really, but this bullshit homework is getting on my nerves... even more than _Zim_ is. Which is a true achievement._

So instead of doing homework, He's mulling over and analyzing what's gone on since that fateful day when the foolish green spaceboy decided to try, and fail miserably every time, to takeover his planet: Earth.

But what keeps popping up is that moment of terror the night of Halloween near 5 years ago. Zim's first Halloween on Earth was the craziest one that he can remember. _He_ almost brought a hoard of monsters out of my head and caused the Earth's destruction.

_But thankfully those monsters were scared to death by Gir, yeah... lets just say Zim didn't come to Skool for a few days because he was tending to Gir's belly ache because he ate over half the neighborhoods trick-or-treating candy._

Trying to shake distracting thoughts from his mind, Dib looks down at his algebra, wiping a bit of drool off of the corner of his mouth, slapping his face, and grasping the orange number 2 pencil in his soon-to-be arthritis afflicted right hand.

" y = 865x + 5/467 . If x = 245/ 357 what is y?... GAAAAH!" Dib exclaims, throwing the pencil at his dart board with a picture of a disguised Zim... it joins the 7 other lethally sharpened pencils in the bulls-eye, right between the annoying and vexing aliens purple contact-covered eyes.

"Even when he's not HERE! He's still messing with me! And something is still nagging me about that night. I think I saw a creepy shier-worthy Keef there but I didn't see Zim-" Dib stops, realization finally lighting his hazel brown eyes.

"I didn't see a monster version of him in my head that night..."

Dib looks at his growing pile of homework, "Damn you Zim... now there's no _WAY_ I'm going to finish my homework until I figure this out."

With equal parts determination and frustration, Dib escapes his bedroom and descends into the basement to find the machine that started this mess Halloween night almost 5 years ago. 

*********************************************************************************************************

"Zim is bored... stupid stinking Earth Skool... insolent stinky Earth teachers... stupid hyuuumon math and inferior take-to-house-work...GAAAAAH!!!! THE ALMIGHTY ZIM CANNOT TAKE ANYMORE OF THIS!!!!" Zim shrieks as he stands up, disturbing the leaning tower of y = mx + b algebra idiocy. It topples down in a wave of pristine white paper, Gir wades into the pool of white and black, back-stroking through the torturing paper ocean to his master.

"Just keep swimin! Just keep swimin! Just keep swimin, swimin... oh ho- ho-ho IIII LUUUUV TOOOO SWWWWIIIIIIM n' SWIIIIIM!"

"GIR! CEASE YOUR SCRATCHING OF THE NAILS AGAINST THE FLAT SURFACE Of stuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuupid EARTH GYPSUM!!!" Zim screeches, voice sounding more like what he just described than Gir's singing voice ever has. Zim grabs onto the desk and sits upon the vessel floating on the sea of assignments.

"THE ALMIGHTY ZIIIIIIIIIIIIIIM cannot concentrate on this outdated Earthen knowledge to decipher what this letter... Y equals when ZIIIIIMMMM has more important matters LIKE DESTROYING THIS STINKING BALL OF MUD INFESTED WITH PUTRID HYUUUUUUUUUMONS!"

Gir jumps at his master's yelling, "Yeeeees MAAASTUUUUH!"

Gir is silent, for all of 5 seconds.

"OOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUCHIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!!" Gir squeals, clutching a paw, he waves and screams like a pig mid-butchering, "DA PAY-PAAAAH BIT MAAAAAH PAW MASTUH!!!!"

Zim rakes his clawed, three-fingered, hands from his forehead to the back of his skull in rage and frustration.

 _ZIM wishes to terminate this accursed SIR-Bot..._ REAAAAAALLY _badly right now._

"You. Are. Made. Of. Metal. You. MORON!" Zim yells, the echoes can be heard faintly on The Almighty Tallest's ship.

"OOOOH! I din't know dat Mastuh!" Gir giggles, a muffled ding can be heard from the kitchen. Gir's cerulean lighted optical monitors glow an unnatural periwinkle before a shrill scream rips through the little Irken robots voice box. The Sir-Bot's eyes turn blood red and his mission is clear...

"THE CUPCAKES ARE DOOOOOOOONE!!!!!! CUPCAKES! CUPCAKES! CUPCAKES! CUPCAKES! CUPCAKES!"

Gir storms through the papers, parting the sea of white with a laser gun to reach his destination. Zim is almost be angry with Gir, but he's just glad that Gir has been successfully distracted.

10 minutes later and Zim really wants Gir back as a distraction. A flicker in Zim's peripheral sight snags his attention away from the neglected English project. It's the screen showing the hidden camera at the door of The Dib's basement. Dib is sneaking into his own basement, slinking against the wall and looking around for any of his Family unit.

Zim jumps up from his perch on the desk, "FINALLY SOMETHING ELSE BESIDES THESE REVOLTING IDIOTIC EARTHEN PAPER TORTURE INSTRUMENTS FOR ZIM TO DO!!!" Zim loses his balance and falls into the calm body of worksheets and project assignments. He uses his PAK legs at the last possible moment to stop himself from eating his 5th History project and his cabled floor, and begins wading through the, now crumbling, mass of homework to his front door, grabbing a hand-cuff like device off of the corner table in the living room

_The Dib-stink is up to something... and this is definitely more important than any outdated Earthen customs of inferior Education on this mud-ball. hmmmm maybe I'll abduct him and present him as a gift to my Tallest!_

Gir is about to follow his Irken master but the giant weasel attached to a laser, Zim had been experimenting on in the lab downstairs, has unknowingly escaped and grabs ahold of the half disguised SIR-Bot that's scream of surprise stops after he is submerged under the Irken's sea of homework. Then the muffled giggles echo off of the newly closed front door.

"BYE-BYE MASTUH!!! HAVE A NICE DAAAAAY-T!!!!" Gir's little clothed hand appears above the pool of paper.

****************************************************

Seeing as Dib knows what the machine actually does now, he calibrates it for a half hour trip in and constructs a portable device that will take him out once the half hour is done. Since the monsters probably destroyed the device 5 years ago out of terror.

Connecting wires and plugging in the device to charge. He quickly goes over to the switch that will turn on the power if another blackout occurs. He pulls one of the swivel chairs over to him and sits, waiting for the 6 bars to be fill in his laptop's lower right hand corner.

Zim merely walks through the front door, seeing as all of the camera's he has hidden in the Humans house show no one to stop him in the living room, kitchen, or the hallway to the basement. On the way Zim looks at the pictures on the walls.

The first picture is of Professor Membrane getting his first nobel prize. And the wall is soon full of pictures similar in pose and awards. Zim, being curious, looks for pictures of the Membrane family all together.

The first bar on the charger glows a deep red. _5 more to go now..._

He finds a picture of Professor Membrane and two newborn infants swaddled in blankets, one child has a giant head in Zim's opinion. But Zim does not see anything odd about the picture and moves on to the next framed photograph without a prize or a posed Professor Membrane.

The second bar on the charger shines a sunset orange. _This is taking longer than it should._ Dib begins to tap his foot impatiently.

This one is of a small Dib and Gaz going to a water park, Zim shivers remembering the Wettening. Gaz is actually smiling and Dib looks like Keef in his creepy happiness.

_I haven't seen Dib smile like that before..._

Professor Membrane is still in his normal lab attire but he is hugging his children as if they mean the world to him. Zim wonders what it would be like to have parents. Though he will say that Human Parental units are inferior to Irken Mother bots and that Irkens do not bring themselves so low as to have feelings about families and such customs.

The machine is now half way charged, the third bar smolders a canary yellow. _I could have finished half of my homework by now!_

Zim, now intrigued about Dib's smile and human growth, looks for more pictures, getting closer to the basement all the while.

The kids first day at Skool. Dib is wearing a blue smiley faced shirt and black cargo shorts. Gaz is wearing a sleeveless purple dress and has the skull plug-in necklace on. They don't exactly look excited, Dib is being forcibly held in place by his Father's arm and Gaz just glares at the camera.

_Did their camera break after that? After all, anything Gaz glares at for too long_ DOES _eventually burst into flames... or at least starts to smoke._

The machine has four bars now, this bar gives off a neon green light. _ComeonComeoncomeoncomeon COME ON! Dad's going to be home any MINUTE NOW! Hurry UP YOU STUPID LOADING SCREEN!_

Zim decides there has been enough snooping and walks to the basement door. But then he spots one last picture. This one is of Dib and Gaz with a woman, she has Gaz's purple hair and it's slightly curled like Dibs sister's. She's holding toddler versions of Dib and Gaz who are grinning and look... really happy. Gaz is wearing a purple day dress with pink flowers, Dib is wearing a smiley faced ice blue shirt with little blue shorts to match. They are giggling next to a local land mark... Mysterious Hill.

The machine has it's fifth bar filled with a bright baby blue. _ALMOOOOOOOST THEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEE!_ A car is heard pulling into the driveway. _SHIT!_ The front door opens and proclamations of "REAL SCIENCE!" are yelled in a charismatic voice followed by "DIB!!! MY POOOR INSAAAANE SOOOOOON~! I'm HOOOOOME!".

Zim opens the basement door, closes it silently, and scuttles down the stairs. Dib's hand, which is holding the lever in a death grip to turn all power back on in the City if he accidentally causes a black out again, is sweating from the suspense. Zim dashes behind a control panel. Professor Membrane's footsteps can be heard through the ceiling. Dib starts chewing his fingernails on his free left hand.

Zim watches in interest. _What is the Dib-pig nervous about? He only ever bites his fingers when Mrs. Bitterz, that she-Flard from Argflarz, has some Stuuupid HyUUUUUUUUMun testing of the paper every Muuuunsday._

The machine's final bar is filled, an Irken iridescent purple glimmers into existence. "YES!" Dib instantly covers his mouth. The heavy steel-toe booted footsteps stop, then there is a clear dash up above. Dib puts on the machine, closing his laptop and presses enter on the device strapped to his head, all the while frantically looking at the door. Zim looks at the door and back at Dib. Dib has yet to spot Zim's revealed Antennae, too worried about his Father to be aware. The lights go out, Dib pulls the lever.

_Peeeeeeeeeeeerfect~_

The lights turn back on, and Zim bodyslams Dib, they kick at each other. Zim's wig comes off in the tussle, as does his contacts. In retaliation, Zim's PAK legs shoot out and grab onto Dib, slicing his left arm and leg, crimson blood drips off of the PAK leg.

Dib grabs the Irken Invader's antennae, a weakness Dib has surprisingly not yet discovered. Zim twitches and writhes but the PAK legs refuse to move from the human boys trench coat, instead of falling into a shivering-mess on the linoleum, Zim grabs onto Dib's scythe like strand of hair.

Zim holds a hidden and blinking hand-cuff device menacingly above Dib, "ADMIT DEFEAT DIB-STINK! I HAVE BEEN THINKING YOU WOULD BE A GOOD GIFT FOR MY TALLEST! YOU'LL BECOME THEIR FUNNY STINKY PLAY-THING! AND ONCE YOU'RE GARGANTUIN HEAD IS OFF OF THIS MUD-BALL OF STINKING HYUUUUUUUMUN NASTIENESSSSS NOTHING WILL HEED THE ALMIGHTY INVADER ZIM FROM DESTROYING THE EARTH AND ENSLAVING ALL STUUUUUUUUUUPID STINKY CREATURES THAT REMAIN-"

Professor Membrane opens the basement door. All is silent...everyone is frozen in place. The white lab coat on Professor Membrane starts to twist and distort, like a twisted shadow of white, a quick flash of gold and the PAK leg pinning Dib to the floor falls gracelessly to the ground. But with the imbalance Zim comes crashing onto Dib. The blinking, bracelet-like, device goes uselessly spinning across the floor.

"D-Dad?-"

Then they are gone in a flash of pink.

Professor stares at the spot where, a second ago, his son was wrestling with an alien. _Dib was right... the entire time. My son isn't insane..._ The pink blinking lights from the object the now revealed Irken invader dropped attracts Professor Membrane's attention. He bends down and picks it up, running his hands over the engraved Alien words on the device.

"I'm sorry son... I will find you... and I will give that vermin a fate far worse than what the Grim Reaper can dish out if he has harmed you in anyway. My poor insa- my poor SANE son." Membrane runs up the stairs and dashes for Dib's room.

"Time to get back to my roots..." Professor Membrane quickly downloads the entire research on Dib's computer to a gleaming gold flash drive. A cell phone appears from a front pocket and he speed dials a being he hasn't contacted since he was a young teen.

"Grim? It's Glad... Listen... someone has taken one of my Scion... yes... I know who took him but I will need backup if what I just found is correct... where you ask? Why outer-space of course... oh... and bring your kids too... this is going to be fun, for you that is."

Professor Membrane closes the phone with a quick click and practically flies into Gaz's room.

"Gaz, meet me in the car... pack all of your security bots too." Professor exclaims, pointing at the stuffed animals in the corner, Gaz gives him "the look", "Don't give me _that look_ either young lady, I know AAAAALL about your little flesh-eating bouncers... I did _build_ this house after all, and I plan for everything."

"Dib has a collection of your canceled experimental-beef collecting-pirate-bee thingies and their hive under his bed in the ninja weapons box he bought illegally 3 years ago." Gaz supplies, expertly changing the subject and reaching the next level in her Game Slave II. Her father shakes his head, hand on his temple.

"No, your brother has never once told me about your little robots of death, and I already knew about both you and your brothers strange activities. I thought it best to let you do as you wished. However, that's not why I'm up here Gaz. Your brother has been abducted by an alien-"

"You mean Zim? Little green guy with fuzzy antennae, pink eyes, no ears, no nose, always wears pink, has robotic spider legs that come out of his weird backpack thing that was attached to Dib a couple years ago, and has the biggest narcistic streak in the supposed Galaxy? He couldn't pull that off if he tried." Gaz grumbles, killing 300 vampire zombie piggy's of doom.

"Well it looks like he DID pull it off. I saw him down stairs and then he disappeared, along with your bleeding brother. But the little ALIEN-SCUM! did leave a clue..." He hands the device over to Gaz, she examines it for three seconds.

"Yep, that's a teleporter. Normally leads back to Zim's place, but this one has different lettering than the last one he planted on Dib... It's thicker, it also has this second button here..." Gaz presses it and a bubble, big enough to cover Dib's gigantic head, blows up in a weird pink color: not unlike bubble gum.

"Incredible... this is a clear rubber polymer... it was to help your bother breath I believe, like an astronauts helmet, fascinating." Her father supplies, poking at the pink now clear substance, Gaz glares at her Father, he looks up and coughs sheepishly, "erm... sorry, got carried away there."

A little anthem comes out of hidden speakers and there are audible clicks and chirps that drone on and on, then Zim's holograph appears, in a flash of pink lasers, grinning and waving. Gaz fiddles with a flashdrive size port in on it's side, plugging it into her laptop and using a translation program she copied off of Dib's computer. She presses the button again and all is made clear what the device is made for and what Zim plans on doing.

"This is ALMIGHTY INVADER ZIIIIM!!! Reporting, this creature I have teleported to the Massive has been the cause of every setback to my mission! He has interfered and annoyed me to no end. I wish to present my greatest enemy to you, MY TALLEST! As a gift. He is exceptionally smart for such a gigantic headed nuisance, he is the only creature on this planet that has bested me time and time again. He is the only creature on this Mud-ball of a planet that has seen me for the Invader that I am, however, he too has failed in his attempts of capturing and dissecting me like a common biology sample. His attempts of revealing me to the public eye have all failed, but not because they were bad attempts but because the other hyuuuuuuumuns are incredibly stuuuupid. It might be that his head is so big, he has deciphered our written language with ease and even hacked into my base several times, much to my chagrin, he would make an intelligent and valuable slave. Anyway back to the point, I wish to claim his stinky-life as a prize for the successful mission. And make him pay for all the failures and embarrassments he has caused me and be spared such a simple death as to be destroyed with his stinky planet of filth. ALMIGHTY INVADER ZIIIIMM! signing off!" The floating Zim disappears.

"Well, that's as much of an answer as we're going to get. Come along now... let's go save your big-headed and completely SANE brother."

Gaz speed-walks behind her sprinting father, they enter the car and head down south avenue, tires squealing.

"Dad we need to turn left on sycamore lane if we're going to Zim's house, not right." Gaz grumbles from shot-gun, beating the boss piggy into a bloody pulp with her thumbs.

"We'll be going back there after we pick up an acquaintance of mine and his little... _friends_." Professor Membrane chuckles nervously, turning his attention back to the road ahead, the trees are growing thicker with foliage and the night is getting darker. Gaz is giving off the aura of bored beyond belief.

"And where are we meeting-"

"Mysterious Hill. You really shouldn't ask questions that you already know the answer to... it is rude and a waste of time." Professor Membrane murmurs sinisterly, his goggles gleam with a cold fire. For the first time in Gaz's life she feels a chill of pure terror run up her spine. He slams his foot harder on the poor abused gas pedal. They speed up the twisting road like bats out of hell.

************************************************************

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who Membrane's "Acquaintance" is? If you looked at the tags it don't count! 5 guesses as to their relationship? hmmmmmmmmm? OUO


	2. This is why we can't have nice things Zim

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zim causes problems, but will this lead to a rocky but much needed "Not-enemy-thingy"?
> 
> "Not-enemy-thingy" Zim's words, not mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FOR Hpfan8 !!!!! Because you were the first user to kudos this and I looked at some of your stories~ *dies laughing* I never knew that Barack Obama x Mitt Romney were a ship! X'D

Dib and Zim land hard on the ground, rolling away from each other and begin to circle. There are no landmarks, no colors, everything is completely white stretching on for, what looks like, infinity.

"Where have you taken Zim, Dib-stink? WHERE on your FILTHY ball of mud have you taken ZIIIIIIIIM!" Zim demands, now balancing on 3 PAK legs, the other is regenerating at an alarming rate. Their circling figures cast no shadows.

Dib looks around, realizing something has gone wrong, "I-I actually don't know this time... we-" Dib then shoots Zim a glare, " ** _I_** , was supposed to be transported to that nightmare world we got stuck in on Halloween a long time ago."

" **WHAT**!!!!!", Zim screeches, gloved claws clenching, the Irken Invader is shaking with rage, "DIB-BEAST YOU MORON! We barely escaped there last time! And there is no STUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPID Monster devices to get us back-"

"Actually there _IS_ a device, to take _ME_ back." Dib smirks, "And YOU'LL BE STUCK HERE FOREVER!!!! MUWAHAHAHAHA! VICTORY FOR EARTH!"

"LIEZ! The Dib-Beast LIIIIEEEEEEZ!" Zim hisses shrilly, eyes catching the protective grasp The Dib-stink has on the device. Dib sees the Irken invader's gaze and quickly hides it behind his back.

Zim glares at the Dib-smell and examines his gloved claws like he's bored with Dib, and raises an antennae. His eyes shimmer with malice, and he smirks evilly right back at Dib.

Dib is shocked by Zim's sudden carefree attitude and that look like he's got him in the palm of his despicable alien scum claws for a second, and Zim's grin grows bigger taking pleasure from Dib's displeasure. Zim's plan is starting to work.

"S-stop grinning at me like that- you're the one in trouble right now Zim! Not the other way around!" Dib stutters.

"You don't get it _do you_ Dib-pig, I'm not in any _dookie_ right now... hmm perhaps if you beg I'll give dib-beast a hint~?" Zim asks, using his PAK legs as a makeshift chair. Dib stops circling, cautiousness clear in his eyes. But Curiosity always wins when it's Dib.

"Ok... I'll bite. Why aren't you freaking out Zim?" Dib asks reluctantly, eyes narrowed suspiciously and holding his laptop securely to his side, fingers turning white from his grip.

"Nope, you'll have to beg better than that, stinky-hyuuuumon." Zim cackles, he continues to examine his gloves even though they are impeccibly clean, seeing as he is the biggest germophobe on Earth... and possibly the entire universe, he picks off a tiny particle of dirt only his eye-implants can detect, and flicks it at Dib.

Dib huffs, and starts to walk away. _No way in the 9 gates of HELL Am I going to_ beg _Zim... but then again, Zim's ego is his downfall... and I don't want the same to be said about my pride..._ Zim prepares to launch at the human dirt-child who turned his back on his most dangerous nemisis. _Turning your back on the enemy Dib? And here I thought he wasn't as stuuuuuhpid as the other hyuuumuns Zim guesses he was wro-_. Dib turns around and marches right up to the lounging Irken. Zim widens one eye and squints the other imitating a humans questioning face and raises his antenna like a human eyebrow.

"pleasezim...", Dib lets out an incoherent sigh mixed in with a grudging mutter.

"What was that Dib-smell?" Zim asks, _Louder Dib-filth~_ ,"I couldn't quite make that out, your eating-hole was smooshed and you did not use enough FILTHY Earth-atmosphere to be heard."

Dib is shaking in frustration. _Is it really worth it? Because this narcistic alien cockroach will lord this over me for a really reeeeaaaally long time..._ One of Zim's spider-legs inches behind Dib, going unnoticed by the conflicted earth-child. 

"PLEASE ZIM! THERE! I ASKED NICELY! THAT'S AS MUCH AS YOU'RE GETTING FROM ME!!!" Dib yells eye twitching from the effort.

"Oh Kay filthy worm-baby, I'm going to get out by-" Zim snags the laptop from Dib, one second it's there, the next it's in the Irken Invader's claws, "Stealing your way out~."

Dib gasps, _SHIT!… Wait a second~_ but smirks coming up with an idea. _2 can play at this game Zim._ "You don't even know what it is that you stole space-dork. Plus~ I let sneezy borrow it yesterday... and doesn't he live up to his name? He said he had-er MAD COW DISEASE!"

Zim screams at a pitch that bats would cringe at, tossing the laptop high into the air. Dib barely catches it before it could've smashed onto the white undescribible floor, leaving them stranded here forever.

" **GEEEEEERMZ! GET THEM OFF GET THEEEEE _FILTHY_ COW MAD GEEERMIEZ OOOOFFFFF! GAAAAAH!** ", Zim screams, retrieving a 'germ-begone' alien spray can from his PAK and works himself into a tizzy spraying himself down and the empty space around himself.

Dib watches, amusement clear as day on his face, then starts humming a little tune and sets up his laptop, trying to find out what went wrong.

 _All of my calculations were spot on... what sort of problem caused this? Where the hell am I? Fuck, "_ when _are we?" could even be the question I should be asking..._

Zim huffs and wheezes from his little germ holocaust he had just a moment ago, eyes trained on the humming nemisis typing at the speed of light. Zim cautiously takes a step forward, testing the waters.

Dib holds up a hand, "Before you try and take this from me again, at least let me see what went wrong in the first place... we might not even need the device. So just hold your horses and take a nap or something so I can focus."

"Zim does not know of any horses you speak of... unless you were spying on my lab and saw the donkey-bulls Zim was creating. And you already know that Superior Irkens do not need to hibernate every day like you lazy hyuuumuns. Now let Zim see it Dib-filth, seeing as Zim's _far more superior_ self will be able to decipher your inferior Earth device. Now if it were a superior IRKEN device it wouldn't have malfunctioned like this flimsy Earth machine you call ' _technology_ '.", Zim sniffs, making 'gimme' hands.

Dib, having gave up on rolling his eyes at every narsistic thing that came out of Zim's mouth, resumes, "Donkey-bull? I really don't want to know, forget I asked. And Zim, I've got this. I made the damn thing myself, and refrain from touching it... your tampering could make things worse... and that statement about Irken technology being better than Earth's is bull-crap. I've defeated every single one of your plans Zim, sometimes not even using any technology. HELL! Some of your plans even back-fired on you!"

"Zim would not mess it up! Zim would make it better! Zim would find out what the problem is before you could! Earth-monkey!" Zim defends, Dib scoffs at the blatant unacknowledgment and avoidance of Zim's failure.

"Zim, be a good evil alien insect and leave me alone for a second, is that clear enough for you?" Dib asks, continuing to type and follows a malfunctionin the apps code in his system, which could ultimately be the anomaly that got them here.

Zim darts for the laptop, " **GIVE THE FILTHY-EARTH DEVICE TO ZIM!!!** "

Zim has a claw on the screen,"Get your THREE-DIGIT PAWS off my laptop Invader Scum!" Dib punches the Irken Invader in the 'squeedlyspooch' by what Zim screeches, Zim retaliates by kicking Dib in the groin, he groans from the strength behind that Irken Biologically advanced leg. "Two can play dirty stinky-pig smelly!"

Zim clambers onto Dib's back, claws shredding Dib's trench coat and marking pale scarred skin red with new blood. While Dib holds the laptop as far away from Zim as possible and repeatedly smashes the back of his head against Zim's face. _knee me in the_ GROIN _will you, you egotistical, narcistic, arrogant, superiority complex afflicted intergalactic insect!_

"GET OFF MY BACK YOU GREEN LIZARD!" Dib yells, grabbing onto Zim's claws and yanking him over his shoulder, flipping the elite Irken Invader who lands solidly on his ass. Zim flinches slightly but crouches, Dib notices Zim's antennas twitches of unacknowledged pain and cackles.

"YOU DARE TO LAUGH AT ME!? STINKY-HYUMAN?!" Zim hooks his invader boots behind Dib's knees and pulls. Dib tumbles to the ground, causing Dib to choke on his laughter and the laptop falls and cracks, shortly fizzing out with a couple of sparks.

Dib stares at the laptop, jaw dropping in horror. Then he twists his head around, looking Zim dead-center in the eyes, hate palpable in this white outed place. Dib's face turns red, steam seems to be puffing out of the teens ears, Dib is in full rant mode, "You just HAD to do that didn't you! NOW WE'RE STUCK HERE FOREVER! THE ONLY THING THAT COULD HAVE TAKEN US BACK WAS THAT LAPTOP YOU FUCKING ARROGANT RETARD! YOU COULDN'T LEAVE ME ALONE FOR 2 FLARKING **MINUTES!** "

Zim backs away from the steaming human, _Dib has never been this angry before! He's almost as scary as his sister-unit..._ Almost. Zim scrambles for the laptop, Dib takes a menacing step forward, flames of pure undiluted HATE burning in his honey gold eyes.

"LOOK! ZIM IS FIXING IT! NO NEED TO BE ANGRY DIB-STINK!" Zim's PAK legs shoot out, having been stored in his PAK when he came into physical contact with the Dib during their fight moments ago, and starts piecing together the laptop. Zim presents Dib with the finished product... it's screen is melted from the Lazer and a bunch of the keys are fucked up and in the wrong place. Zim presses the power button. It bursts into flames and disintegrates into ash.

"heh-heh..." Zim coughs/chuckles without humor.

Dib halts in his steps, the fire of anger slowly spluttering out. Dib slumps to his knees.

_We're doomed, just like Ms. Bitters always says... and it's always because of Zim..._

"You better find a way out of this space-boy... because I've got nothing." Dib grumbles, poking the now smoking remains of his laptop.

Zim looks at his earthen enemy. He's never seen Dib so... crestfallen. It isn't right. _For some reason the Dib-stink's frowny...-ness is messing with my squiddely spooch. Perhaps it's some unknown hormones the humans use to get sympathy?_

Zim shrugs and takes out a mass of metal from his P.A.K..

"Now tell Zim what the device was supposed to do and Zim will be able to create it using this?" Zim says, dropping the metal pieces on the ground in front of the Earthen protector.

Dib looks at the metal pieces, then at the melted plastic puddle of what remained of the device meant to take him back.

"Do you even have a power source that's powerful enough to give off more than 100 joules of pure electricity?" Dib half asks half mocks.

Zim looks taken aback, "Your Earth _jew~L's_ are measured by energy yes? ...then, Zim has an-er... a power source... of sorts."

Dib looks at Zim with an eyebrow cocked, "what do you mean by _of sorts_?"

Zim stops wringing his claws, "...I'll tell you after you swear on your Earth you won't steal or damage it... it's very-erm important to Zim."

Dib grumbles, having weighed his options A. Grill Zim for details(which Zim will never give, that stubborn little leprechaun) B. Refuse (stay in this white monstrosity forever with, only the most annoying alien Dib has ever had the IMMENSE displeasure of meeting and seeing every GODDAMN DAY, **ZIM** as company, definitely a NO!) Or C. Make a deal with the Devil (Or in this case the one being in the ENTIRE FLIPPIN UNIVERSE that Dib is sure he hates with every electron, neutron,  & proton in his body). _Option_ C _it is....DAMNIT._

"Fine, I won't try to steal and/or damage it, and so I swear by all the mysteries on Earth. Happy Space-boy?" Dib reluctantly promises, hesitantly offering his hand.

Zim narrows his eyes, whether because of the boys words, his outstretched hand, the very action of Dib making a deal with Zim at ALL or a melting pot of all the above mentioned. But Dib's eyes stare into Zim's, and Zim, knowing that Dib would never... EVER tell a bold-face lie (although Zim accuses the Hyuuman of the action more often as on instinct and/or refusing to acknowledge any fault in himself or his plans) knows he can trust the stinky Earth-monkey in this. Zim snears at Dib's hand, but takes it awkwardly in his three-clawed hand and shakes it, as is the Earth custom he has seen hyuumans partake in. Zim still remains narrow-eyed but chirps the commands needed.

Zim's PAK legs come out cradling a small white iridescent orb. "This is Zim's power source, without it... Zim will perish within a couple of seconds." Zim looks worriedly and anxious at the softly glowing orb, but covers his nervousness with the return of the ever present cocky smirk, bravado not quite reaching his magenta eyes, "Think you can make something that can be powered by this? Or is it too _advanced_ for your puny little dookie brain?"

"Yeah I think I can manage, I _have_ been stealing parts from your base for years Zim, I've basically rebuilt Tam's ship from scratch... I think I can manage a little jerryrigging." Dib chuckles, refusing to acknowledge the glimmer of fear in Zim's eyes.

"So this is a hyuuman activity....this state of... Not-enemy-thingy?" Zim asks, gently putting the orb back in his PAK where it belongs.

"It's called an "Alliance" green one," Dib snorts, "alliances are where a group work together to achieve a common goal."

"That's ... like the Empire's will." Zim whispers.

Dib barely caught it, and Dib doesn't think Zim knew he whispered it aloud, so Dib just turns back to the pile of metal. _So Zim has a rudimentary knowledge of what an alliance is. Granted, the definition I spouted is closer to what a TEAM is rather than an alliance but... whatever, he gets the point so get your big brain crackin' and stop wondering about Zim._

"Hey galactical booger, you got a torch somewhere in that parasitical PAK on your back?"

"...I've got a laser?"

 _This is going to be a looooong fucking day-err night ... whatever the fucking time is_ here _. But, we'll get out of this one reasonably unscathed._

"You're doing it wrong you worm-baby! GIVE ZIM'S LASER HERE YOU STINK-BEAST! STAAAWP! YOUR MESSING IT UP!" Screeches in Dib's ear.

 _If I don't kill him first._ Dib tries to put up the, barely there, patience-threshhold he has for Zim, eyes twitching and grin growing into a grimace.

Zim ends up melting the parts Dib has painstakingly made so far.

"THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS ZIM!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always please comment! I get motivated by doing such and that is where most of my ideas for fic's come from.  
> And it's basically the only communication that I get every day... ~sighs~


	3. Shadows Brought to Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brothers reunited  
> More Shadows Brought to Light  
> Discoveries discussed  
> Where is the TRUE Fight?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I got a friendly reminder that this fic existed and I sort of was focused on other things rather than this I'm posting another chapter! HAPPY EARLY MERRY CHRISTMAS! X'D TTUTT~♥

Proffesor Membrane parks the car next to a voltswagon bug. Gaz unbuckled her seat belt at level 336 and steps on gravel at level 339. A tall black hooded figure evaporates out of the shadows along with a big nosed, squinty-eyed boy and a blond maleficent aura-d girl wearing a deceptively girly flower dress both debatably around the ages of Dib and herself who are just behind the figures robe.

"Hello Gladys. It's been a couple millennia since you've called, let alone, asked for help." A jamaican accented voice flows from beneath the hood, "and this is one of your scion yes?"

"Yes Grimmbald, it has been sometime since I've contacted you brother dear." Professor Membrane steps forward, picking up Gaz and depositing her on his shoulder, even the manhandling Gaz just went through did nothing to distrupt her from her game zone, "But unfortunately I'm not here to play catch-up. My other scion was taken by an alien. I regret to say that I didn't believe him when he told me of such a lifeform, I called him insane trying to keep our duties out of his sight.... now he's been taken by a creature out of our grasp. The only clue I have, is this teleportation collar."

Professor tosses the collar at his 'brother', the black robes catch the collar quick as a snake and bring the blinking collar closer to examine, "Is this a joke Glad? I know that your sense of humor is rather strange but this is not something to turn into a prank."

Gaz is tenderly placed on the ground, where she multitasks playing her game and observing her father and her 'uncle', Gladys is at Grimm's throat in a flash, "You know I do not joke bald-y. If it were it would have a bit more taste than using my HEIR as material for a PUNCH LINE bone head!"

The hood falls, a bone-y head is just what appears, red glowing orbs of light appear in the empty eye-sockets. A scythe appears and slices at Gladys, who fortunately dodges the lunge at his throat and backs out of range.

"I would NEVER joke about this Grim! A Scion is far too important to use as material for something as petty as a trick." Gladys growls.

"If that's true, then why are you showing me a fancy collar? Why are you calling for my help when you already know how to get to your missing scion Gladys?" The Skeleton moves closer as soft as a shadow. The two children yawn and make there way over to Gaz, sitting down quietly on either side of her.

"Because it isn't on Earth Grimm. It's out of our tested powers' limits. I don't know if My powers will work, not to mention yours. We only hold power over Earth's creatures, these are ALIENS Grimm. They are not of Earth, I don't know anything about them. The only source of information I have is from my scio-Dib's computer files. I don't even know if they have Vitalies among them to negotiate with. It's beyond the worst possible factors in a situation Grimm... I-I don't know what to do." Membrane visibly deflates, "I-I can't lose him Grimm... he reminds me of _her_ too much, going on about Earth's mysteries... I only started calling him insane to protect him, to shield him from what his destiny will become... I wanted him to have a normal childhood."

Grimm timidly moves forward, hugging his brother, "Gazlene _was_ always there to kick your ass into gear and stop you from over thinking situations. I miss her too Glad... and you know she would be kicking your head in right now for not immediately going after her son."

Professor Membrane sniffles, "I know... but that's what makes this so hard. She's not here... how could I have given my children a childhood without a mother? Why didn't I just choose from the children already here?"

"Because you loved Gazlene... and she was going to have your children one way or another Gladys...*chuckle* she really was hard headed, that woman. But why the tears!? We should leave feelings for later... right now we have my nephew to save." Grimm let's go and turns around to the children sitting quietly on the ground, "OH! I ALMOST FORGOT!"

Grimm snaps his fingers, mutters a few unintelligible words and the two silent children seem to brighten. The boy gets up and quickly runs over to Professor Membrane, "SO YOUR GRIMM'S BROTHER!? you don't look like him at AAAAAAAALL! You don't look like a skeleton!"

"Billy shut your trap, they don't have to look the same way to be brothers." The girl turns back towards Gaz, and Billy continues to annoy Grimm and Glad,"So what video game are you allowing to suck up your soul?"

"Gameslave, it's something I use to ignore people who annoy me... or if I'm bored I just play. I'll let you play in a second, I'm about to kill the God boss vampire piggy and beat this game into dust." Gaz supplies, doing exactly as she promised and hands over the gameslave, "Names Gaz, I'm detecting that yours starts with the letter M... any relations to the dweeb in my 4th period class?"

"Nice instincts, it's Mandy, and no. Whoever named the kid "the Letter M" must've been on some serious mental medicine. So Grimm's brother Glad is your dad? From what I was told by Grimm they haven't talked to each other since your 'mom' died. Said something about it being his duty to take her, law of equivalent exchange. So while those two weep and hug it out I suggest we come up with a plan. Because those dweebs aren't very observant, Grimm because I've lived with skelly for the last 5 years of my life, and your dad because he's a bit of a drama queen." Mandy says bluntly, making quick work of the first 10 levels in the gameslave.

"You don't beat around the Bush, I like that. Now that I know you have sense, unlike the adults gossiping over there, I can tell you now that they probably aren't in space." Gaz says casually, sipping a poop cola she had snuck.

"What do you mean? They're still on Earth?" Mandy asks, turning her gaze away from the game to look at Gaz with calculating eyes, while simultaneously leveling up 3 times.

"My weird brother has this obsession with Zim. And I could say the same about Zim. Zim is the alien that _supposedly_ kidnapped my brother by the way. But the thing is, Zim isn't all that focused on world domination like he says he is. He's narrowed his mind on Dib. Zim is an Irken Invader, Elite of the Elite. But because Zim caused a bunch of death and destruction back when he was with his own people he was pretty much banished here by the Tallest. Yeah I know their hierarchy is determined by how close they are to touching the ceiling with their head, their aliens their weird. But back to the point, I don't think Zim actually _WANTS_ to take over Earth, subconsciously anyways. He's defended the Earth more times than Dib has, and he focuses on Dib like Dib is heroine and he's an addict." Gaz supplies slurping half of the can, "Plus Dib went into the basement with his laptop. He had 10 mountains of homework to get done. Dib has straight A's. The only thing that could distract Dib from his grades is 1 of 2 things: Zim, obviously, and his own insatiable curiosity. Seeing as I caught Zim going into the house after Dib went in the basement on my security cameras and the fact that the teleportation collar was left behind leaves Dib as our culprit. It's probably the opposite of what my dad saw. Dib probably _accidentally_ kidnapped Zim. And with Zim... there's the guaranteed result of chaos. Zim destroyed whatever Dib made to transport them there and they are working together right now trying to fix it and are precariously tightroping on the delicate line between killing each other and resisting."

Mandy pauses the game, "mouthful, so basically your dad called Grimm over a missunderstanding."

"Yes to the original situation. But no to the one that's going to arise soon." Gaz replies, Downing the last of her poop cola, trying to drown the itchiness of her now dry throat,"See, Zim _was_ going to send Dib to his Tallest. But in the collar there was also an automated message stating that Dib would basically be Zim's gift to his Tallest for taking over the Earth, praising his intellect blah blah blah. So what changed Zim's mind about trying to face off Dib relatively fair and square? What made Zim try to teleport away the one thing on Earth he loves to fight? The one thing he actually enjoys doing?"

Mandy glares down at the city from the cliff, "He's trying to save him from something."

"Bingo."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fore _shadow_ ing o.O ^u^ I wonder what Prof is~


	4. Mary and Mastuh

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait guys! X'D

Dib holds up the tireless fruit of his labor, having had to spend something close to a day and a half with Zim. Everything was one step forward two steps back until Dib's stomach had growled. Being curious Zim had asked if the pitiful earth-pig was hungry but tossed a highly sugary granola bar at him. After that Zim started to actually be helpful rather than detrimental to progress. Actually listening to what Dib said about the laser's power being too strong Zim ended up making a blowtorch by tampering a large amount of power, and even snuck some IRKEN apps and programs into it for faster loading.

Zim claps Dib on the shoulder, which would have made Dib jump had they not been both thoroughly exhausted. Zim carefully hands over the glowing orb and Dib puts it in.

Dib turns on the newly-made laptop, "Everything seems to be in order, realignment with my machine worked... and we're..." Dib can't believe his readings.

Zim raises an antenna, "Well?" Zim sees Dib's unbelieving face and forces it out of Dib's hands, quickly reading theinformation Dib had gathered.

He swiftly turns back to Dib, "What. Did. YOU. Do." Zim shoves the laptop at Dib, screen displaying Zim's P.A.K. as their location.

"It-It must have been because of your ambush in my basement... and the fact that it was only supposed to transport one person ... instead of taking us to my brain's nightmare realm it took us to your P.A.K., because it calculated it would need less energy to bring both of us there. We probably wouldn't have made it if the device had planned to take us into my nightmare realm, frankly it would have killed us in all likely-hood." Dib reassures, pointing out the initial location data on the screen.

Zim sits heavily on the ground, Dib quickly takes out the power source for the laptop and Zim's P.A.K. legs shoot out, tucking it inside itself carefully. Zim lays on his side, eyebrow ridges wrinkling his forehead.

"So how do we get out?"

Dib, bites his lip in contemplation, "We can't use the device with that orb of yours as our powersource... there's too many variable that could go wrong, it would probably kill you. Soooo... we find a new source."

Dib lays down on his stomach in front of Zim, arms propping up his head.

Zim scrunches up his face, "What do you mean-" something clicks in Zim's P.A.K., his red orbs widen in alarm, "OH NO! ZIM WILL NOT ALLOW IT!"

Dib's threshhold of patience wears out.

Dib shushes Zim with a finger, pressing firmly against thin green lips, Zim blinks in in surprise, "Now I'd like to point out two things, 1. You don't have any other idea and neither do I, and 2. If we don't we're going to die here... _together_ …and personally I don't want to be here with you at all, and I don't want to die a virgin. So unless your mechanical parasite of a brain can figure out a different way, I'm going to hound you for the rest of the time we're here."

Dib removes his finger and sits up, towering over Zim in his criss-crossed pose, "So either tell me where we can teleport ourselves in your P.A.K. for a better power source... or hear my brain-rotting rendition of Bloaty's jingle." Dib's grin never looked so evil.

Zim gulps in terror.

*****

The brother's finally stopped talking and gather the kids into Membrane's car. It is a quiet ride for the most part, Mandy playing Gaz's game whilst she points out different moves and hiding bonuses to get, and Billy singing off-key to a popsong he's listening too on his headphones. Gladys and Grimm are completely silent.

Once Gaz points out the extremely strange house, Gladys can't help but face-palms at his obliviousness. _Some foreign exchange student, he was definitely_ foriegn _alright._

The group park the car and get out, Gaz holding them back at the sidewalk, "Zim's defenses are no joke, although installed by an idiot they were made by Irken specialists." Gaz picks up a rock and throws it into the yard. The knomes come nonlinear and shoot lasers at the rock until it's nothing but a bubbling mess, Gaz makes a "see?" gesture.

"Now this is how we get in..." Gaz takes a deep breath, " **TAAAAAACOOOOOOS!** "

From the silent house comes a lot of clattering, lights turn on and then Gir flies through the front window.

" **TACOS!? WHERE!? WHERE IZ DA TACOS!? WHERE DID YOU G-O-HO-HO!!!??" Gir cries pitifully, shoving everyone and looking behind them sadly.**

The green dog locks onto Billy who is humming away to his popsong again, Grimm still wishes he had found out about their relaxing influence on Billy years ago when the boy would literally be bouncing off the walls sometimes. Gir Waddles over to Billy and tilts his head acutely. Billy sees him and immediately crushes him in a hug, "DAAAAAAW~ IT'S A LIL' GREEN PUPPY! ISN'T HE CUUUUUTE~!?"

"I thought I was a Mon-gooZe! Ah've been Livin' A Lie mah WhOOOLe LiFe!" Gir starts bawling again, a taco falls out of Billy's back pocket, Gir wriggles free and devours the taco loudly, allowing everyone to see the food being chewed in his mouth.

Gaz snaps her fingers, "Gir, you want more tacos, right?"

Gir nods his head enthusiastically.

"Then locate Zim and I'll get you some."

Gir gasps, happy tears leak out of his eyes, he Waddles over to Gaz and hugs her tightly, rubbing his head against her stomach, "Ah LOOOVE YOU!"

Gaz pries him off, "Less hugging, more finding and I'll throw a cupcake into the bargain." Gir is flying back into the house, and comes back with a mini-laptop.

"The compoooter saaaaaid that Mastuh is in his own P.A.K., and Mini-Moose saaaaaaaid that big-headed boy's there With Mastuh! They gettin' MARRIED!" Gir exclaims happily. Grimm can't hold back an outburst of laughter and Gladys's jaw hits the ground.

"WHAT!?" Membrane screams.

"Wouldn't be surprised." Gaz says, stepping in front of her father, "Dib is hooked on Zim and Zim is hooked on Dib."

"Mastuh LOOOVES to fight Mary! And Big-headed boy LOOOOOVES to Fight Mastuh! And if they don't see eachother, Mastuh and Mary get rEAAAAAAL sad." Gir reveals, "Like earlier roday! Mastuh had too much work and went to play with Big-headed boy! Wasn't sad to go!"

"So Dib and Zim are together in Zim's P.A.K. ... Dib was probably trying to do something in the basement and Zim came over to mess with him because the homework the teachers forced on us last-minute was boring. And, like always, Zim being an idiot, he royally screwed it up and now Dib's trying to work together with Zim to get out of wherever they are." Gaz finishes, she fishes out a cupcake from her pocket, "Here's the cupcake, I'll get you the tacos tomorrow."

Gir lunges at the cupcake and swallows it whole, rubbing his belly and burps loudly, "That waAZ deLICious!"

**Author's Note:**

> good bad?  
> please comment!


End file.
